| Hard Questions Simple Answers Part 4 |
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| Written by R. Nati | |
 In regruads to all the questions about where we are? and when will be? Ect.... I tell you in town, in the Holy city of Jerusalem, there are many many a Tzaddik, as well as us regular folks preparing 'Begdei Moshiach'. There is a local tailor in Meah Sharim, who is swamped with orders for new these new clothes, only to be worn for the arrival of the redeemer. He has so many orders that he can't get them done fast enough. They are very beautiful indeed. I am also wanting to buy, one,$. Anyway this started right after Pesach this year. He said it all started 'with a certain Rebbe and then another and ect...until everyone here feels the energy of what its to come, 'people are talking'. I want to 'please Hashem' be able to soon to write and of course put up video and pictures of his arrival. and have the first interview with him. But till then I'm doing what we must do! Get up Davin, learn, pray, Take care of a family. And in the mean time I'm here trying to help my fellow Jews. Anyway I opened, as is my practice a little sefer called 'The Empty Chair', a book of aphorisms by Rebbneu. I simply asked Hashem to speak to me and randomly open and read what he has to say. And many a time it applies directly to what will come this day kinda a spiritual heads up so to speak. Ok so this morning I asked Hashem to speak to me and give me something to share with you. The page in tittled simply 'On The Spiritual Journey' "Spiritual awakening begins with inspiration coming from without. Then once you are already on the road, the real work begins. Keep at it and inspiration will come from within." (L.H. 3:152c) Rebbe Nachman said that, often, even just his daily religious obligations felt like a crushing burden. But the Rebbe found a way to bear the weight of his devotions by each morning saying to himself, " I will ignore tomorrow and all future tomorrows- today is all there is!" The Rebbe understood what wears us down most on our spiritual journey is the feeling, that there is to much to accomplish. Instead, he advised focusing only on the task at hand. By doing so, we can overcome even the most daunting of obstacles. We need to just keep it simple, and to the fact. I for example use to look at the siddur and say how long is it gonna take to say all this overwhelmed by the length of the prayers. So I said brachas jumped to shema and from there added on the each week more and more. the same with my learning I used to look at all the nesassry reading a Jew must do each week and say 'efashar' there's no way I can read all this but slowly I just started to read the parsha for the day, then tanya for the day, chassidus, then halacha 1 law a day then, ect. if I had time to read something else, I wanted ok I did if not not . Same thing in prayer I would tell my yeitzer I'm only gonna say one bracha of shemonei esrei with kavana, then another and another till I Please Hashem make it all the way though. I've come a long way thank to Hashem. But now when I look up from where I stand, I see mountains, "BIG MOUNTAINS " in front of me. Gone are the days of flat sand and foot hills, Now the real work is begining! But we can climb any mountain one step at a time. And there within lies the the secret; One step, one day, no more I/we can make it for the day! You have to believe this to carry on. Ok so I fell yesterday! And this last week I let the ruach stuss knock me down, 'Blam' ok there was a time when I would cry and pout for months on a wrong committed now the I know the key is to acknowledge my fall, ask for forgiveness, stand up dust off and run before the next wave comes, the quicker we do t'shuva the less hold the Other side has on us. So I prayed for three days, went to kever of Shumel HaNavi took a mikvah in the miyan there Davined. The next day ran straight to my Rav admitted everything, asked for a tikun, and asked if he would help me to fix myself, He lovinly said "sure let's just keep going", "there's no time". "It's a test, you moved to Jerusalem, it's a higher level, and along the way you kinda made to yourself vows 'right' not to continue a bad habit and not to bring along the old ways, and you reassured yourself that you would in no way fall in the things of the past. yeah, right? So? Well guess what new level bigger improved Yeitzer, blam 'TKO' on the mat what do you expect at the old level you killed him. But at the new level you gotta work out to beat the newer, bigger, meaner, Yeitzer, Now get back in the ring and work on it now! I hope that you realize that I'm really a regular man who is working hard on himself to change and to be worthy one day to be called a kosher person, a Menche till then I'm just Reb Nati trudging up the slopes in the mud. Azamra (282 of Likutey Moharan) The 'nikodah tovah', look for the good point is based on this. "I will praise Hashem with my life; I will sing to my G-d with the little I have left." (psalms 146:2). With only what I have left I'll cling to You in praise. And Hope only in YOU! Master of the Universe, help me! you work in amazing ways; Your love is so powerful. Help me to able to make myself happy at all times. I am shattered and broken. Help me to be happy always. Teach me away, You and You alone know all things: You know everything that has happened from the day I was born until today. You know everything that is happening to me today and this generation, and everything taking place in the whole world as a whole and in all the souls of all the Jewish people. You know what I am going through- a poor degraded, ruined sinner. even to myself I am cruel. You know everything that has happen to my soul: from the day my Neshamah, Ruach and Nefesh were first emanated; How they descended through the worlds of Atzilut, Beriyah, Yetzirah and Asiyah; how the were brought into all the bodies that they were incarnates until they entered this body of mine, this gross and materialistic body... You alone know the meaning of all these mysteries and all that happened to me in those times and since then until today. You know all that I have done, the good the bad. You know all my sins and transgressions, day by day-those that were unintentional, and those I did deliberately; those under compulsion and those I did of my own free will. And You know whatever good points I have managed to gather. It was only through Your kindness that I did so- even in the bad times Likutey Tefilas I 90 exsurpt from Reb Nosson's prayers 'which I have made mine with little changes' I have endured from the day of my birth until today, ONLY BY YOUR UNMERITED MERCY!!! FYI...BTW and so have you all of you! Shalom from the Holy city Jerusalem. Reb Nati |
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| Last Updated ( ראשון, 20 יולי 2008 ) |
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